Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Pro-Choice Solution To Eradicating Abortion... Pro-Lifers The Ball Is In Your Court! Will You Play?

If you're anything like me, you are sick of these right-wing whiny ass pro-life douchebags bitching and moaning about abortion. Ain't it kind of funny all the "Pro-Lifers" are so "Pro-Death Penalty" and "Pro-War". How's that even possible, beside simply being cynically hypocritical assholes?

Well righties I've got a solution to your problem. Since you insist that these babies be born no matter what the circumstances! Incest, rape, deformity, disease, destitution, it doesn't matter you want these babies born no matter what! Well it's really simple, and I think over 99% of the women who'd get an abortion would comply with these terms. So here you go, I'll step you through the process....

1.) Attain an attorney. Now you may want to look for one that's just as fucked up in the head as you are on the whole "Pro-Life" issue. You may get pro bono service or a huge discount off their regular rate. Just a suggestion.

2.) Attain a notary public. In my experience most attorneys can double as a notary public. But just in case not, you'll need this for the latter steps. Again repeat what's in step one, if you get a notary who have narrow and obtuse views that align with your own you may save yourself some dough. 

3.) Ask said attorney to prepare documents "Assumption Of Liability And Responsibility"

4.) Go to any clinic providing abortion services and do either         
      the following......
      a. Meet any woman face to face choosing to have an 
          abortion procedure and present her with the documents
          "Assumption Of Liability And Responsibility". Have said 
          lawyer and notary present, they can serve as witnesses.
          You will ask her to cancel the procedure and proceed
          with the birth in lieu of you legally assuming all liability
          and responsibilities in the rearing and care of the child 
          child to be born. The documents insure that you will 
          emotionally nurture as well as financially support the
          child. That you assume every liability and responsibility
          of parenting the child.


        b. You can advertise your willingness to do this. Go to 
            said clinics and put out a stack of cards or brochures
            with all of your necessary contact information, and 
            should state your desire to take on said responsibilities
            of their child should they cancel their procedure. 
            You can also advertise this via, TV, newspaper, 
            billboards, and the internet.

Basically you're willing to adopt these children. You do this and I'm sure this will render abortion practically useless. So who's willing to shut their big fat yaps and and STEP UP? Either PUT UP or SHUT THE FUCK UP! Whichever of these you decide to do we still get a problem solved. So there you have it... YOU'RE WELCOME! 

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Ode To "THE" Asshole: Andrew Breitbart (February 1, 1969 - March 1, 2012)

If a picture is worth a thousand words then this one have to be worth millions.

Let's just face facts here. Andrew Breitbart was not a good person. I don't care how much all these right-wing fucktards mourn and honor him by hating everything decent, joyful, ethical, honest, righteous, moral, educational, noble, principled, in a single word... LIBERAL!

You see, Breitbart was the quintessential right-wing pitbull. If there was a politician, person, group, or organization dedicated to giving anyone poor, disenfranchised, downtrodden, or seen as "different" a voice and right to democracy he was there to ridicule, demonize, and mock them with furious fervor. He cared not what it took to get it done, whether it was to lie, fabricate, beg, borrow, and steal. Breitbart didn't give a shit. He was not going to see social justice and equality succeed. He also made sure to do everything BIG! Whether it was BIG Government, BIG Hollywood, or BIG Journalism, he proved with each story published by his equally inept cast of contributing caricatures that if this planet was going to be full of assholes, he wasn't just settling for being "an" asshole he was going to be "THE" asshole. This he achieved with BIG success because he most definitely was "THE" BIG ASSHOLE! True to that form you could count on anything coming from Breitbart to be foul, stinky, dirty, and just plain full of shit.

Now if you righties want to know what true compassion and benevolence really is this would be it...

"My prayers go out to Mr. Breitbart's family as they cope during this very difficult time. I do not intend to make any further comments." - Shirley Sherrod

Now please take into consideration that this woman did not ask for the shit storm she was thrown in the middle of by Breitbart on his sinister quest to bring down anything "President Obama". This woman like any of us who was doing her job day in and out minding her business, world was thrown off it's axis because a bigoted, partisan, intolerant, hate mongering, hack of a douchebag hates a Black progressive President so much that he didn't care who got caught in the crossfire. If he had nothing... No problem! True to right-wing conservative values, he was going to JUST MAKE SHIT UP! No wonder you saw him on FOX News so much. 

You Know there was this old Black gospel hymn that I til this day I still hear at funerals. Mostly of Black elderly people. The song is called "Let The Life I've Lived Speak For Me". Let's just take a look at the sentiment that the life and legacy of one Andrew Breitbart wrought....

Now you may think that's a bit harsh. But Let's take a look at Mr. Breitbart's own posting about the death of the late Ted Kennedy whose life actually amounted to something and a man who championed for fairness dedicated his status, position, and life to a true greater good....

There it is in his own words. All you righties should let this be a lesson to you. All that pinned up bigotry, hate, resentment, malice, and anger can kill. Even now as you read this you have a bunch of fucking idiots who were blind Breitbart sheep coming up with the conspiracy that the President killed Breitbart. Now normally I wouldn't even mention it, but I thought that anyone who took the time to read this blog post deserved that good laugh. So you see, Breitbart though foreboding, sinister, and baleful he wasn't a dummy like his patrons. Breitbart was a pornographer of the press, and he knew that his cretinous followers had an insatiable appetite for his smut journalism. Neither Breitbart or his loyalists let the truth and facts get in the way of his literary bile. 

Breitbart along with the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, Laura Ingraham, Matt Drudge, Joseph Farah, G. Gordon Liddy, Mark Levin, Ann Coulter, Liz Cheney, Bill Kristol, Judson Phillips, Rupert Murdoch, Roger Ailes, and James O'Keefe (to just make a short list) have kept the mill of bullshit, lies, hate, bigotry, and partisanship churning out vitriol long enough. Hopefully they take a lesson from Breitbart's demise and realize all that pinned up bullshit and hate isn't worth your mortality. 

Lastly I commend some progressives that I saw on TV and read articles from such as Goldie Taylor, Toure, Lawrence O'Donnell, Arianna Huffington, and Tamron Hall who said really good things about Andrew Breitbart and didn't slam him for the evil, slimy, fucking snake in the grass he was. As I said I commend them, but as for myself I feel that if all you've done is dedicate your life's work to deceit, lies, hate, divisive rhetoric, and total bullshit while you were alive, you're still that same person only a dead conniving, slimy, weasel, low life, bottomfeeding, scumbag, snake in the grass. Sorry, but in my book you don't get to LIVE that WRONG and then get to DIE so RIGHT. So don't get it twisted. Condemning his wretched and vile life isn't the same as celebrating his untimely death.          

       This is what so many on the right heralded a "warrior and hero"? The bar is set mighty low on the right.